This week, I’d like to submit a poem that I honestly should have written and posted a long time ago. However, seeing as the hostilities covered in today’s poem are still “at large and in charge,” for lack of a better saying, I still hope the message below strikes a chord with all who happen to read it. Feel free to “like” and share it, too, and spread the message around in hopes that the world moves forward from the especially hurtful, childish, and outright asinine way of thinking it details.
Thank you all, and happy reading.
Dustin M. Weber
War Between the Sexes
September 15, 2016
“We men are losing everything to these self-serving chicks—
These petty wannabe Amazons who see all us men as hicks
Who’re out to make them bear our spawn to satisfy the state
And keep them in the kitchen, wherein which they brew their hate.
We used to be the breadwinners—the leaders of our households—
But the masses now scoff at that model and declare it to be ‘old.’
Now women have been taking our jobs and cash, yet still aren’t satisfied
And won’t be ‘til we become subservient and flush our pride.
I don’t know ‘bout you, fellow gents, but I’m sick of being walked on
And treated like I’m worthless by some bitch who claims to be ‘strong.’
We’re men, after all—human beings—and refuse to be treated like crap,
So spare us your flack, husband beaters, and shut your nagging traps.”
“Well, excuse us, whiny man-baby, for wanting independence like you.
Did it ever occur to you and your ilk that we’re people, too?
Your paranoia of us ‘taking over’ is nothing more than that.
Just give us equal representation in the workplace and scat.
In fact, give us better treatment, seeing as you childish farts
Have too often abused your power and have torn this world apart.
You even put down your fellow man just to make sure you stay on top,
Even when you’re terrible at your job and the masses want you to stop.
So much do you market to your own kind it’s enough to make one sick.
We weren’t all, after all, put on Earth to ‘please’ you little pricks.
You know, if the world were matriarchal, we’d all at last be free
From you meat-headed warmonger perverts and all your tyranny.”
“There you go again with your sweeping generalizations, Jezebel.
Why don’t you take your prejudice and leave it with you in Hell?
See, that’s the kind of hatred I’d brought up earlier, dear—
The kind of bitter vindictiveness men like me have come to fear.
Even if we men having been in charge for so long has been a bane,
You needn’t cry victim and return the favor by bringing us pain.
Two wrongs don’t make a right, you know, nor do the double standards you pass
In order to prove your ‘equality’ to us in prestige or class.
You demonize rape and domestic violence, for instance, yet don’t realize
That women, too—believe it or not—have beat up and violated guys,
And if we dare physically defend ourselves, we get vilified
While you stand so finely by and mock us, no one daring to bust your hide.
As far as marketing goes, what about all the times we’ve been dumbed down
To make you look like the ‘smarter’ sex and us all like bumbling clowns?
Call us childish all you want, but we’re not the only ones.
You’re just as immature as we are, you petty daughters of guns.”
“Even if we’re being immature, guess who started it first
With the whole notion of ‘gender superiority’ and who’s better or worse.
For every rape and domestic violence case our kind has invoked,
Your kind has pulled off several more—enough to make us choke.
Blame it, then, on your fellow men for not staying in line
For the rules that play against you when the threads of truth unwind.
As for each marketing scheme that portrays you men as dumb,
You might want to see who’s behind them before you further succumb
To the sweeping generalizations for which you yourselves are to blame.
In fact, who passed them off first in a fit of pride and shame
In an effort to keep their office and the control they’ve attained
Over the whole world, of which many of you I bet hope to retain?
It’s all about power and control for you, we’ve come to learn,
And speaking of wrongs making rights, prepare to get burned,
For our ‘wrong’ would’ve never happened if you’d never made yours first,
And this third wrong from your precious movement is only making things worse.”
“You’re always showing off your bodies, sexualizing yourselves as you please.”
“Hey, it’s your own overactive sex drives bringing you to your knees.”
“Are you saying we’re the only ‘saucy’ ones, Ms. ‘Shades of Gray?’”
“Are you saying we all like that smut? Go back to those games you play!
“You mean the games you never touch ‘cause of their ‘testosterone?’”
“Well, I sure don’t mean that kiddie crap you claim you’ll never own.”
“Fine…but you go back to those books with the plots you’ll never know.”
“And you go back to those dirty movies and all the smut they sow.
“Like you don’t enjoy ogling the physiques of our fellow ‘beasts!’”
“Hey, at least we’re discreet about it and not like you in the least.”
And so do the two sides bicker, both right and wrong in their own ways,
And as much as I’d hate to say it, I doubt we’ll ever see the day
Both sides set aside their differences to help this ailing world
Pull itself back together from all the damage that each boy and girl
In the past has inflicted upon it through any and all misdeeds
He or she has done to support the cause in which he or she believes.
If only there was a peace table at which we all can converse
And explain why it is we feel the way we do before something worse
Than what we’ve all already endured befalls upon us all.
It’s as the saying goes: “United we stand. Divided, we fall.”