Mix It Up
August 15, 2016
Day after day after day after day,
Doing the same thing the same old way
With little variation from day to day…
That’s no way to put on a show. No way!
Yes, you need a formula for any show,
But you’re supposed to be “variety.” Are you? No!
Not when you keep on airing the same old shorts
With the same old folks in the same spots, sport.
Your show’s long become predictable as Hell,
And because of that, it’s gotten boring as well—
Not a good adjective for what’s supposed to be
A much-beloved, time-honored comedy.
You’ve got to mix it up, man. Keep things fresh.
You already know how well your cast members mesh.
Now try them out in different roles and let them expand
Their talents so as to better reinvigorate your brand.
Stop acting out the same skits over and over again.
Bring out some of the old ones that we haven’t seen since when
You were at your finest and switch up the ones you’ve got
So that they play out differently before they start to rot.
Stop recycling the same tired old jokes, too,
Come up with some new ones to keep folks fixed on you,
And please…none of that crude crap we’ve heard from other shows—
That childish, lowbrow, crass shtick that only brings folks woe.
Why else, after all, do you think we tune in to you?
It’s ‘cause we’ve long been entertained by what you used to do
Until you kept on repeating the same exhausted lines.
That’s why many have walked away, leaving you behind.
Another way you can get this problem resolved,
Look to unused talent and get them involved
Like those two funny women whose humor we’ve enjoyed
And those veterans who came back, yet you’ve underemployed.
Your weekly guests, while a mixed bag, aren’t special anymore,
And to see them get so much spotlight has become a chore.
No matter how good they may be, their talent rarely compares
To the proven in-house favorites you already have there.
You craft your games around them and the projects they’re a part of
To the point where you’ve ignored the crew we’ve come to love.
Where’s your sense of being, identity, and pride?
Do you really need these outsiders to get crowds to come and see?
Nostalgia isn’t everything. That I know for sure,
But once upon a time, my enjoyment was pure
In the show you used to put on, yet don’t anymore
Because of the unvaried content you’ve had for us in store.
For the love of Heaven, then, mix it up right away!
Give us something fresh ‘fore we all go away
And leave you with naught but gluttons for mediocrity
In your loyal fanbase with no demand for quality.
It’s not too late to change, and change I hope you do—
Not just for my sake, either, but for all who love you.
Just give us the variety you used to give back in the day,
And you’ll be awesome once more. Please trust in what I say.