Grow Up and Do Your Job
June 21, 2016
Grow up and do your job,
You pathetic, fat-assed slob!
Quit trying to evade
That for which you get paid
And that which ‘fore you has been lobbed.
I care not if the task’s reviled.
You’re just acting like a child
For trying to avoid
That which makes you annoyed
Yet’s still yours to complete all the while.
You’re an adult, for goodness’ sake!
Stop behaving like such a flake
And act your damn age
Like the wizened sage
You’re supposed to be, Ms. Half-Baked.
I don’t see why you’re so scared
Rolling up your sleeves to prepare
To dirty your hands
As per the demands
Of your occupation, Dame Blair.
Where do you get off dodging these,
Anyways? ‘Cause you
Know it’s all too true
That you can’t always do as you please.
We all have jobs we must do
On this rock ‘til our lives are through,
And if you won’t do yours,
I know folks by the score
Who’ll gladly take them over from you
And do your job ten times better
Than a whiny, self-entitled fretter
Like you ever would
Or even could
While you sit at home knitting sweaters,
And when you’re all alone at home
With one dime left to call your own,
Relying on your kids
To keep you off the skids,
You’ll sit often ‘nough all alone
To ponder where your life went wrong,
And you’ll think back to this song,
And you’ll curse the day
You gave your spine away
And your boss made you say so long,
And as you sit there and weep
Every night ‘til you fall asleep
Feeling sorry for yourself,
A lone book upon a shelf,
It’ll at long last hit you deep:
It never pays one to shirk
Whenever it comes to one’s work,
For it will come to pass
When you take in the ass
The pain, you insensitive jerk,
For only the diligent reap
Reward for their work, which they keep
While the spineless and lazy
Are punished like crazy
In the end before the Big Sleep,
So you’d better grow up right away
And care ‘bout your tasks today
Before karma hits you
And leaves you oh so screwed,
Left to naught but wallow one day,
For prosperity never goes
To those who bring naught but woe
To others day and night
Out of petty spite
Towards their duties. Trust me, I know.